'I remember, how could I forget?'
'I remember, how could I forget?'
The fourth one
Hi, hey, hello–I’m on a roll!
In my last column, I shared a story about a moment where I practiced spontaneous generousity—giving my mango lady $100 after my heart was moved seeing her and her daughter standing out in the freezing cold.
I’m discovering that in this landscape of altruism, a delicate balance emerges between spontaneous generosity and intentional giving (I briefly touched on this in my review of the Gospel of Wealth). I advocate embracing both approaches. I think to nurture spontaneous generosity, one must develop a sense of intentionality. I know it sounds like such a contradiction, right? Let me explain.
What I'm advocating for is a mindset of readiness to give whenever an opportunity arises. When I refer to spontaneity, I mean being open to giving in unexpected situations, such as encountering someone on the street, in a waiting room, or at McDonald’s asking for help. It's about not only having the willingness to give but also being equipped with something to offer in those moments. So, while it might seem contradictory to plan for spontaneity, it's about ensuring that you're always ready to extend a helping hand whenever the need arises, regardless of the circumstances or timing.
I was chatting with my dad the other day, and he started telling me about this incredible experience he had that completely changed his outlook on giving. As he was sharing his story, it got me thinking about all those times I've seen someone in need but didn't have any cash on me (wasn’t prepared) – you know, like pretty much every millennial. Take a listen below.
Both my dad and I have discovered that the most effective way to stay prepared for spontaneous generosity is by setting up what we’ve called a giving budget. Personally, that means making sure I have cash on me whenever I go out. Living in a city like New York, you encounter people in need everywhere – on the subway, while heading to school, even just running to the bodega down the street; the need is ever-present.
I vividly remember one time when I was on the train when a homeless man asked for spare change. I had nothing to offer, and I'll admit, I was a bit annoyed (I'll definitely delve deeper into those kinds of feelings soon!). When I apologized and explained I had nothing to give, he opened his hand and offered me the few coins he had collected. The immediate rush of guilt hit me hard. Here was a man with nothing, yet he was willing to share what little he had with me.
The actions of this random man taught me a valuable lesson: generosity knows no boundaries, surpassing financial means or personal convenience. Whether it's my competitive spirit (because you're not going to outgive me!) or my genuine compassion and empathy for others (probably a bit of both), after that encounter, I committed to always be prepared to give. Whether it's cash, a warm smile, or simply acknowledging someone's presence, I strive to be there for others whenever they need it.
👉🏽 Have you ever experienced a moment where you were moved to give but found yourself unprepared? Did that experience help you create a giving practice?
So, whether it's spontaneous generosity or planned-out philanthropy, giving ultimately boils down to genuinely wanting to make someone's day brighter. When we blend both spontaneous generosity and intentional giving, we're not just helping others—we're building a world where compassion and empathy thrive, making a real difference in people's lives and our communities.
⭐️ Are you a new subscriber or did someone share Everyday Ribbons with you? Either way, welcome aboard! To catch up, browse through some of the previous columns—I'm on a mission to redefine what generosity means in today's world. So, grab a cup of coffee, settle in, and get into it.
—you’ll notice I use the word ‘so’ quite often. you’ll also most likely notice bad grammar and the overuse of commas and punctuation in my writing—so yea